Standstills

I’m stuck in a standstill.
A place where time passes me by
A time where I’m all alone
I need to get to a place
But I can’t find it.
I can’t move
There’s nothing I can see

Somewhere Beckons
I cannot answer but I hear it keenly
A vacuum where I’m unnoticed even by the ones I wish to be seen by
I want to move to the lights
But all around me is darkness
Time remains frozen
And I don’t know what to do

I wish for someone to call out to
Somewhere I know is waiting
Coldness within me
Snuffs out any fire ablaze
Freezing my insides
Making it brittle
Vulnerable to cracks

Something hits me
I don’t know what
I feel something shatter
Deep within
I know there is pain
But I feel only emptiness
Where is my pain

I cannot stay here
I need to find the light
A path to be found
Got to keep moving
Stage a prison break
Strengthen myself
Move out of my standstills.

Flowers, of Numbers and color

(Ahem. This disclaimer is to show that I’m not against the spirit of flower giving nor is it having anything against flowers or florist in general.)

Of color

They say White Roses show respect
But what kind respect do you want?
That of a parent? A elder? As kin? As family? Close friend? A lover?
For yourself or your accomplishments?
How about self respect?

Red Roses are meant to represent passion
But it doesn’t mean to be passionate about someone doesn’t it?
I can be equally passionate on my cars, computers or models
It could be my work or simply finding meaningful things to do
You can find passion anywhere or just about in anything

Yellow Roses are to show envy
So I should use this to show a friend I’m envious of his life
Spread the word that I’m jealous
Oh yeah! I’m jealous that you found someone better than me.
Awesome. Spread the word………

Red and White is for reconciliation
So for passion and respect to come together
You hope for a reconciliation?
Go fly a kite, easier to get lightning strike
What are you doing letting go in the first place?

(Another disclaimer where I will claim having no knowledge what all this actually means. It’s meant only for fun nothing else. Nothing serious. Honest)

Of Numbers

One Stem = Only One
If one is for just you, why am I deemed stingy?

Two Stem = World of 2 people
Apparently you want one big happy family. Isn’t two of us already cosy enough?

Three Stem = I Love You
Yeah I know it’s easier to give this then say it.

Four Stem = Undying Promise
A commitment just to you and to no one else, just how many guys you see give this anyway? (Other than the pricing problems.)

Five Stem = No Regrets
No comment on this one except as above

Six Stem = Happiness and Satisfaction
Let’s face it. This because the florist is HAPPY to sell something and we are SATISFIED to get something which we think is bound to make you happy at a good price.

Seven Stem = Endless Good Wishes
Guys let’s not go into this one. We’ll never live up to this and we certainly don’t want to be found lacking.

Eight Stem = Please Forgive Me
I didn’t mean it. What ever I did to make you mad anyway.

Nine Stem = Eternity
I’m yours forever as long as your eyes are on me that is.

Ten Stem = Perfection
You are perfect no matter how you look or what you do. (Besides you won’t take no for an answer)

Eleven Stem = One Heart, One Mind
When it comes to this stage, it means you know all my thoughts and movements. I surrender and live all future planning to you.

Twelve Stem = Heart to Heart
The sweetest time when I first met you and we didn’t know each other (well enough then)

Superficial, Superb, Scuttled

Have you ever had a day that you wake up too with a sense of forbidding? A day where you just cannot shake off even though you don’t remember having made any appointment, promises or anything resembling a schedule? A day where everything just cannot be salvaged rendering any effort to do so futile?

Well congrats to me I just had such a day. Absolute rubbish day to go and end, even on a beautiful morning……..especially on a beautiful morning.

Most of these feelings are now mostly negative……..hey don’t expect optimistic thoughts here. This is a rant. A RANT………… They were also cause by people whether directly or indirectly. Loose cannons who blast without disregard of what they say although a great many things pointed out by them in this way was also pointed out and admitted by them for their own transgression. Not only that, they are puffed up so full of themselves, sometimes you wonder why they don’t burst with all that hot air. Here’s an answer for you which is typical of a world dominated by superiority of perceived experience of the world. These people seem to fail to notice the discrepancy. Well kudos to them.

When something goes wrong, you delegate to the those lower life forms ranking below you. When something looks up, you also delegate but to yourself and all those higher up. Ironic that the results tend to be something lower life forms do but seldom get the credit for. When something goes wrong, blame the small guy even if he followed instructions to the t. this is reality. Harsh reality.

Sure the apologies are forth coming as well as attempts to justify their words or actions. Too bad the damage is done. Wounds done on the body can heal but wounds done to the inner psyche seldom do and do so slowly.

There are those who wants to go by the book and will do so to the extreme with no bends in rules or ability to relent or reconsider a certain action. These dumb asses then expects others to be cut some slack get real.
There are those who are the mighty judges and would try to impose their superiority whenever they can. Peacocks they are but sometimes they can back it up with their experience however they are too set to see another point especially if it contradicts their own.
There are those who instantly want to show that they are the boss and would try to take leadership roles as fast as possible and in the meantime bash down the opposition. These little bugs would show their displeasure without considering the reason and if there is, shoot it down with everything they have.
There are the lecturers of life who would regale you with incredible stories of their life experience and follow up with some cock and bull reason meant to be the moral of their just concluded story. The truth? Nothing related or have the slightest bearing on the topic. Nuff said.
There are others who are the downtrodden who find other ways to relieve their stress or repress and bottle everything within them or finding ways to vent them though in not so direct ways.
Also remember first impressions are very important as you will always be judged on it. So to mislead, screw it up but be prepared to face the consequences as they’ll be hard to change.


End of rant.

Nothing on the topic that happened nor any reason why it did. This is after all a rant. After all who really wants to talk about what happened. Just made me unhappy that’s all. Nothing to it.